Roll on holiday from hell! It sucks that I have to spend my summer break with Grummer, my boring old grandmother. And the fat loser down the road, Toffie Appel (what a name - get it?), won't stop bugging me. Staying sane is the goal. Bring on my secret mission: to find a new husband for Grummer. FOCUS! First action point: target places where suitable old wrinklies might hang out. Ka-ching!

Techno-savvy and full of attitude, Beatrice Wellbeloved discovers that all is not what it seems, and the best laid plans can go wrong.

Edyth Bulbring is a former journalist who lives in Johannesburg.